FROM THE MANSE

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The following was overheard before a church service (not in this church), when a toddler said to his grandfather ‘ Grandad, everyone is talking but no-one is hearing!’

It reminded me of a line from a Simon and Garfunkel song Sound of Silence ‘people listening without hearing’ and made me wonder whether we are so anxious to get our point of view across or tell our news that we don’t really hear what the other person is trying to tell us. They may have an important piece of news, a difficulty that needs to be shared, a joy or a sorrow waiting to be let out, which if we are talking we will probably not hear.

We need to listen attentively to be able to truly hear what others are saying, and they may be trying to tell us things ‘in the silences’ as it were. If you are attuned to listening it is often in what is not said, or an expression, or even a look of pain in someone’s eyes that tells you all is not well, even if they are saying ‘yes, I’m fine.’
From the Gospels we have a picture of Jesus as a healer who listened to people’s inmost needs, who heard their stories, who engaged with them on the deepest level. Think of the exchange with the Samaritan Woman at the well, or the healing of the epileptic boy in Mark’s gospel.

To listen to another’s story is to value them as a person and can be one of the greatest gifts we can offer. When I was volunteering at a homeless drop in centre, the tea and endless toast and jam played a large part in the centre’s success, but the most important role of the volunteers was not to make sure the tea pot was full, but to sit and listen. The vulnerable people who used the centre commented that it was this gift of time and being heard that they valued the most.

This is because, I believe, if we take the time to hear another’s story we are saying in our actions that we value them as a person, we are acknowledging our common human bond, and also the divine bond we have as we are sisters and brothers in Christ.

It is a huge honour and privilege to be entrusted with even part of another person’s story and we need to ensure that we are worthy of that trust, and not to gossip about others and to be sensitive about any issues of confidentiality, and to ask permission to include people in prayer lists etc.

One of the gifts of Abbots, is I believe, the way in which our church gives space for this sharing, in the Coffee shop, at Open House, at the prayer time at the Shoppers Service and at Pop in for Prayer, as well as the more formal routes of the Prayer Cascade, the Pastoral visitors and Bereavement visitors. But we can all in our own way be part of this listening ministry not just in church, but in our everyday lives. We need to make space to listen to God, and be attuned to what the Holy Spirit is prompting us to do – it may be as simple as going over to the person who often sits on their own and making time for them, to value them, and in so doing to show God’s love in action.

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I exist in a web of relationships - links to nature, people, God. I trace out these links, giving thanks for the life that flows through them.
Some links are twisted or broken: I may feel regret, anger, disappointment. I pray for the gift of acceptance and forgiveness.